i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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