The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Drunk is a universal language darling
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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