I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize