Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
