Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
