Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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