Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
