please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize