all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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