He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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