so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
