she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
