i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
