He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
