You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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