guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
