Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I think my vagina is haunted
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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