We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
