Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
