But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
