I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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