Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Randomize
