At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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