Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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