Only a mothe r could love this liver
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Randomize
