O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
We had sex on a dog bed..
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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