You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
