Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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