Banned from zoo.
Again?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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