So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
