We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
