Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
