tell your sister to shave her snatch
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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