...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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