apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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