There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I want her autograph on my taint
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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