I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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