you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
