belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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