My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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