when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
