I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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