ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
