I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
porn star boner night. come get it.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
