Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Houston, we have a squirter
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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