kristin has been a bad kristin
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
