I seem to have left my pride at pride
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
