don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
