I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
