You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
